tell a story thread

ok this place needs some life so lets start another group thing...basically the rules to this are...I will start out the story with a sentence and you guys can add on to the story with your own sentence, try to keep it short to one sentence so it will carry on without someone trying to tell the whole story in one post. I’m going to start it off with something odd so we’ll see how weird this gets, and no it doesn’t have to rhyme I’m just starting it that way.




There once was a guy who thought he was high and dry, but one day he realized he wasn’t and started to cry…

he came from nantucket..on his head wore a bucket..attitude to life was "ahh fuck it"

his uncles name was nipper he was a carpetslipper till he stuffed his ass with broken glass and circumsized the skipper

And then, out of the blue, he realized that his beloved dog, Frank, was missing and that his neighbor, Mr. Wurst, was looking exceedingly happy this fine morning.

"Dang," thought the man from nantucket, "one more reason to cry, now that I'm high and dry."

and then he saw the icecream man..who was a woman and man
her name was hedwig....and in tow was creamsicles..and mr cleano

and the man thought hey neato..hedwig has a thriving libido..and i think its now time to feed her..and him

so they had banana splits and draino and listened to edwin mccaino
and she realised the doorknob was polished but the lights were exceptionally dim.....

So he wined her and dined her, so fine did he find her, until under the sheets they went.

and then with a sigh oh did he reply you dont look like julianne moore...more like harvey dent! :confused:

didnt realise she was bent/ but hed already spent/needed to emotionally vent/and soon he was sticking his pole up her tent

Soon the camping was done, and so was the fun because the outdoors wasn't her friend.

And of an ear I did lend, but only of recompense, alliterated out of your common sense, but when you bent I will commend your fugly friend!

for she has a brain like a mango and a posterior like beetlegeuse,,,,,

Yet, and still to noones surprise! On a dark and stormy night... I'd beat it up!!!

Remarked the lonesome stranger who whistfully had been watching said event with a mammoth sized pair of binoculars. My arms are getting sore from all of this our new hero remarked....

and when love was sparked said stranger took their hearts like in indy jones sacrificed in underground thrones to hethen gods

only to be reincarnated in god's name.......unaware were his foes as they happily twiddled their toes and gave each other hugs and kisses as they celebrated his sacrifice...much like Jesus.

and then ate cheetios and played crisco twister..

Never a more sinister game was ever played....in fact i think i saw Judas with a blade...Jeepers Creepers muttered the beefy cyclops....

and then perseus from "shaa-boy-gan" wisconsin showed up with a tazer and killed dracula with a well pitched tuning fork

But Persuses ear wasn't what it used to be and neither were his eyes and his "masterfully tuned" Fork killed Solei Moon Fyre instead . This caused the world to mourn but morning came quickly and with it....

and with morning came mourning and soon pm dawning as prince be used his special crystals to reincaranate the she/he man as a rather gruffy dog named stan

then stan bodly proclaimed...roxanne roxanne....i wanna be your man...and the chinese hamsters in his mind started yodeling....

But this past adventure was just a dream their was no he/she man....no hamsters yodeling...or bouts with dracula.......he looked down to check himself and found that he was still the same man he had always been.......never played CRISCO twister unless it was with a straight non-hemaphrodite...non bisexual...female human. one day this young man thought to himslef "why would anyone write about me online?" People are cruel he concluded as he looked around to see that his dog frank was still there....alive and kicking.

and he realized the philosophical still needs to pe poetically waxed

So out came Yertle the Turtle and stated in a bold type manner "Waxing ain't my scene" Indeed waxing wasn't his scene. Yertle was last seen however with a swedish whore who was a wax musuem enthusiast....this of course led us to....

Madame Tussauds came from behind the curtains to tell Yertle..."You dont want that tramp. She once was a crack whore that liked giving Hot Karls."

And colden golden showers...

and kool aid caramel karate massages

and then je jumped madame tussauds and gave her some of his man wax

Ole Yertle was giving the Madam a good "what for" and was pleased by his waxing antics. "WHO needs Swedish whores?" grunted the turtle who was on top. Somewhere back in his head tho Yertle knew he did need a bit of Swedish whore. The Spring had came and it twas the season after all....

but when yertle finally realised his swedish whore wishes he thought to himself whats a good swedish whore good for these days? certainly not being swedish or whoring..so he hired said whore to protect his young on the beach..unfortunately a passer by began bangin the whore and during this time the eggs were washed away

and then syxx wakes up from his dream with crisco in the corner of the room and a sock named ollie

... GLUED TO HIS INNER THIGH!

attached to a rubber chicken!

with clothespins on his nipples......HEY WAIT A MINUTE! :madrant: :thebird: :fawkdance: :bash: :stupid: :grouphug:

(mean while back in the story)


....the audience is getting confused as to what soliel moon frye has to do with jerry lewis and hugh jackman and starsky and hutch.....and....along came polly.....and yertle the turtle and yodeling hamsters....Jack Hannah and Disney World.....red headed ladies like Shirley Maclain.......in the same story.


Need more mices and singers....preferebly easy to recognize ones....from TV.


*caution* eating may cause memory loss. I already forgot that a girl from my high school is now married(definitely would have remember that.) and soulja slim is dead back last fall.

but i like ham said the left water ski!

and then they started a water sports competition