what the hell is up with Jane? add-a-line story

[Mistress M]

I'm bored, so how about we all see how creative we are, and start a story thread? Just to keep it interesting, you can only add up to 10 lines to the story until someone else posts on it.

I'll give it a lame start:

Jane was walking down the street, humming to herself. It was freezing cold, and she clasped her coat tightly -- only half-conscious of the temperature. She was too busy trying to remember the lyrics to a song that had been plaguing her all day to really notice anything else. Zooming down the street on auto-pilot, muttering to herself: "Paper doll, something about a paper doll..." Suddenly she stopped and looked up. "What the hell...?"

Ok, take it away...

[syxxpm]

it was raining tacos.........jane had never seen a shower of diced cheese before and wondered what to do..does she eat ?does she run for shelter? or does she try to remember what she was previously thinking .....anyway a freestyling mailbox told her to stop taking so much nyquil and she and then she realized the agonizing truth........

[Mistress M]

She was a nyquil addict. It had started slowly, a couple of years ago. Taking an extra dose here and there, using it to help her sleep on restless nights. Soon, it had engulfed her -- her two or three bottle a day habit forcing her to slowly start doing all those things she had once believed so despicable. Stepping over the cheese falling about her, she was intent on making her way to the nearest drugstore -- the sweet, seductive desire for the green liquid overwhelming her senses. Finally approching the drugstore, she flung the door open, only to find...

[syxxpm]

the green liquid morphed into a whip cream bikini clad enrique iglesias who went on to sing both of his hits over and over till while throwing mentos at her.....as she came to the realization that this was not a hallucination but in fact a supermarket buried on an ancient indian burial ground for the forsheezy tribe( a tribe known for their sick sense of humor and haircuts)she came to the conclusion......

[Elizabeth]

Julio was standing in her way. "You can not come here again. I have told you once. If I tell you again, you know what will happen." But Jane did not believe him. He didn't have the balls. She was gonna get her NyQuil. Another sunshine day for Jane. Julio was just jealous because he didn't understand the happiness. Jane smacked Julio hard. He expected as much. She attempted to pass him, but he grabbed her arms. Then they both started laughing. He kissed her hard, and she smacked him again. The lives of NyQuil junkies have their ups and downs. Julio noticed something on the floor in between them.

[Mistress M]

It was a little flower, delicately growing higher and higher, until it unfurled its delicate little petals. "How beautiful!" Jane cried. But then, the flower started changing, started becoming meaner and crankier. Suddenly, it was looking like Seymour, and it kept getting bigger and bigger. Then, without any warning, it swallowed Julio whole. Letting out a satisfied belch that smelled suspiciously like a chalupa, the flower started shooting up higher and higher, piercing through the ceiling. Forgetting entirely about the Nyquil, Jane started climbing the large, rough stalk...

[daveisback]

......like - yet uncannily humanistic vines until realizing she was climbing the famous leg of none other than Richard O' Brian off the Crystal Maze -who had grown ridiculously large due to an elergic reaction to Nyquil. all was doomed for fair Jane ast O' Brian unleashed his deadly harmonica and playest a jingle beknowest to many celebraties of shitty game shows. the music he playeth casteth a spell on all theyn present making many speaketh elizabethen and turneth all the raineth cheese into "3p off KitKat" coupons. just then steve mcqueen flew....

[Terrick]

...away


the end.




just kidding.....


flew...like he'd never flown before. Then Newton's 1st Law took effect. He forgot that, though he was so high up the leg, he was still on Earth and began to fall. "I'll kill 'im! Kill 'im I say!" he said, speaking of his new enemy, Isaac. He immediately heard a deep, yet strong voice. "I'm already dead, foo'!"....

[carlessman]

Richard woke up. It was a great dream of blue and green rivers coming together to make up nyquil lake of love and sunshine. now, the headache was coming and Richard was wondering where his next bottle of blue nyquil was going to come from. wait, blue was last night, he needed to find red. His apartment was littered with bottles from last night's bash. He remembered singing stuffy head, water eyes, coughing, aching, so you can sleep, medicine at the top of his lungs with his crowd. his crowd... he missed them already. how had he found a group of people with his same addictions? nyquil and sex were an attractive combination, but to have found thirty people with the same needs was kinda freaky. then, he remembered jane.....

[Mistress M]

She was the one who had introduced him into the scene -- escorting him into the underground world of sickly, sweet liquid and the kinky sex games that went along with it. He had been avoiding this lifestyle for years -- keeping his addiction secret, not even his closest friends knew about this side of him. But Jane knew. The second he walked into that night club, she singled him out -- as if somehow she could see beyond his facade into the very blackness of the secret desires he held in his soul. "Come with me," she had told him, "I know what you want..." His life had never been the same from that fateful moment. Now his nights were spent in complete and total abandon, doing things previously unthinkable...

[daveisback]

...she led him blindfolded to what he hoped would be one of those sexually orientated dungeons as he could hear sounds such as whipping and spanking going on in the background and random "yelp"s and "woof"s and "heynonnynonnies" being screamed by prosumably hugh grant and puff daddy (sometimes simulataneously :donno: )...
...slowly undoing his blindfold his anticipation was followed by a dreadful dissapointment and an utterly bewildering confusion as he looked forth upon a clan of.....................
















.....strange little yellow people waving at him.... "NOOOO" he yelled for these were known for their torturous hour long conversations of corn flake recipies and methods and techniques for ardvark tickling.....

[Terrick]

then he realized that they were no more than a centimeter tall and stepped on them all. But he kept one to poke with a stick every time he got bored .... he wanted to leave, but more fell from the ceiling. He suddenly remembered watching the hypnotists on Oprah and did his best. To his surprise they all started beating each other up . He decided to let them continue and turned around. "Going somewhere?" said Spot (that is his name, right?) , the 7up dude, standing in his way of the door....

[Mistress M]

...Spot looked pretty tough in his little leather dominatrix outfit, and somehow Richard just knew that he was the gimp in the situation. "No, he's not going anywhere," Jane said, pushing him down into a chair. The little yellow people swarmed him like roaches, tying his arms and legs to the chair. "Nooo!" he cried. He looked up at Jane, "What's going on here? What are you doing to me?" "It's OK baby," Jane said, stroking his face, "just take some of this..." and she handed him a sheet containing transparent green capsules. It was Nyquil like he had never seen it before!....

[daveisback]

...in fact he was so miffed as to what was going on, the poor guy had to search online to figure out what the hell Nyquil was! http://www.vicks.com/products/nyquil_liquid.shtml "snake alive! HURRAH!! with a YIM AND A YAM and a TALLY HO BIGGLES!!!"..... yes at this exact precise moment it was so clear now!!..................


......he had come to realise he didn't know what in the fuck was going on, what he was talking about and wether there was any plot in this dumb ass story at all!!!......... but still he grabbed the bottle of nyquil and drunk the lot....
...high as a fuckin kite the world was a terrifying place. just then he saw...............


..... a man with 3 arms! with his balls in one hand and a guitar in the other two - !!!none other than dave from the wirral!!!!...

"hey diddle diddle,
d'ya fancy a fiddle?"

"erm no... im set thanks..."

"wee willy wifter!!,
yer got any bifters?"

knowing the strange man was obviously drunk, richard slowly walked away, in fact he went on to do something completely different... never to speak of this ordeal again.....

[Hero1]

until he realised that was no man with three arms playing his balls like a finely tuned guitar..that third arm was coming from some1 in the dark behind the curtain.. he snuck back their to find.. a man yelling smookie while viewing gay porn on his laptop

now where had he seen this before he mused..

and then it hit him.......