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Thread: 10 Startling Facts About Vegans

  1. #1
    From Outta Space! Cozmo D's Avatar
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    1. Did you know that scientists have proven that a strictly vegan diet can be hazardous to the growth of wisdom teeth in infants?

    2. Did you know that soy bean ice cream has been proven to cause brain freeze 83% more often then real ice cream?

    3. Did you know that because of the startling high amount of fibre in their diets, that scientists have speculated that vegan farts may be a considerable contributer to the destruction of the ozone layer?

    4. Did you know that Horticulturists have speculated that people on vegan diets have sped up the depletion of the rain forests by 17%?

    5. Did you know that mad cow is a man made disease that was created in a secret vegan lab in San Francisco in 1982?

    6. Did you know that no vegan has ever lived past the age of 47?

    7. Did you know that Attila The Hun, Ivan The Terrible, John Wilkes Booth, Jack The Ripper, Hitler, Stalin, Jim Jones, and Sirhan Sirhan all were vegans?

    8. Did you know that scientists have discovered that diets that contain excessive amounts of tofu in males can cause premature ejaculation?

    9. Did you know that scientists have also discovered that excessive amounts of soy in the female diet can cause frigidity, sterilization, and in some extreme cases excessive pooting during intercourse?

    10. Did you know that it has been speculated by the scientific community, that a world wide switch to a vegan diet would cause excessive weight loss among the worlds population, thus causing the earth to drift out of its orbit and crash into the sun?

    Just thought that you guys would want to know all this.

    And its all true too...yes it is...uh huh, I swear...I know it is cause I read it on the internet somewhere...I think.

    EZ
    Coz

    ps- slow morning ya'll
    Alright
    Tap the lightpole and we'll be jammin all night
    And ain't nobody callin' the cops
    'Cause everybody's here freakin', if they're older they're doin the rock
    And every block from all around
    Comes runnin' to the park when they hear the sound
    And soon the word's spreadin' through our part of town
    "Yo, 40 Park y'all, Jam-On's gettin down"
    Yeah...

    Jam-On Productions:Website Forum

  2. #2
    Intelligent Posts :11
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    ROFLMAO....... awwwwwwwwwwwwww shit. Damnit Coz, will you just let the damn dog sleep. Quit kicking it....

    Brian

  3. #3

    I'm getting my post in before the next 5 pages :rofl:

  4. #4
    Senior Member Deity's Avatar
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    LOL!!! :rofl: Dammit, Coz! You're too damn funny! I'm laughing so hard i have tears in my eyes; which makes it really hard to see what i'm typing...I can't wait until the "replies" come rollin' in... :thumup:

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  5. #5
    king of useless info syxxpm's Avatar
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    yikes..... round 3,012 :mrgreen: -syxxpm
    the vibe says syxx so let it be syxx......

  6. #6
    waiting for Spring Louis85's Avatar
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    Cold Coz, just cold. :moon:
    I love the summer months!

  7. #7
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    Come on Coz, Cows eat grass and guess what they have to do to make room for pastures? Cut down trees.. Look, they have supplements these days that can replace any deficiencies that are caused by vegan diets. But we're just getting there. I think the food most of us eat is ridiculously unfortified anyway, even cereal.

    It's important to get fats in your diet. A vegan may have a hard time getting important fats/phospholipids. Take phospatadyl choline, serine, DHA supplements then people. Eat plenty of eggs and Peanut butter. You don't kill anything when you eat an egg, sorry vegans. So if you think chickens suffer at the plant, that's the whole other issue of animal rights.
    "I can feel the boredom too, I'd gladly go with you."

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    ANd one more thing in defense of vegans. A glass of carrot juice has 2X the amount of calcium as milk.
    "I can feel the boredom too, I'd gladly go with you."

  9. #9
    waiting for Spring Louis85's Avatar
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    And tastes 2X as bad.
    I love the summer months!

  10. #10
    From Outta Space! Cozmo D's Avatar
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    Ohhh come on guys!

    Don't you believe everything you read on the internet?

    I know SOME of us do...right Matt?
    :crazy:
    heheheh

    EZ
    Coz

    Alright
    Tap the lightpole and we'll be jammin all night
    And ain't nobody callin' the cops
    'Cause everybody's here freakin', if they're older they're doin the rock
    And every block from all around
    Comes runnin' to the park when they hear the sound
    And soon the word's spreadin' through our part of town
    "Yo, 40 Park y'all, Jam-On's gettin down"
    Yeah...

    Jam-On Productions:Website Forum

  11. #11
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    YOU ARE A CLASS ACT COZ

    I thought you were going to bring the facts but that was cheek cramping.

    what about the curses?

    much love nomatter what
    Michael

  12. #12
    Senior Member frEk's Avatar
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    [b]<span style='color:black'>i actually thought you were totally serious for a minute coz, and i was thinkin where the hell did he find all this crap hehe.........and yes matt, laying hens are mangled tortured mutilated killed in the production of eggs which is why vegans do not "eat plenty of eggs" or any at all for that matter nor do we eat honey, cheese, milk, or whatever else we can exclude that comes from an animal...it doesn't have to be directly related to death (which could be argued what is or isn't...ever see that bumper sticker "guns don't kill people, people kill people"? kinda my point) and are you serious? vegansim and animal rights are totally different subjects? i doubt there are very many vegans that do it for other reasons....nonvegan vegetarians maybe, but veganism and animal rights are very much intertwined.............oh yeah i eat plenty of nuts and i cook with flax seed oil to get my fat and some people go on special vegan "mediteranian" diets that are especially rich in fat..........</span>

  13. #13
    From Outta Space! Cozmo D's Avatar
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    very many vegans
    kill people
    for other reasons....nonvegan vegetarians
    are mangled tortured mutilated killed
    YOU SEE PEOPLE!!!

    These vegans are dangerous. They are nafarious scum.
    You should ban them all Sainthax, before they spread their poison any further.

    What is more, since Prince Be was once a vegan, you should ban him too!
    He may be a subversive.

    And as for those vegitarians...we need to watch them VERY closely...
    Especially that Elizabeth charachter.

    You've all been warned!!!

    EZ
    Coz
    :stupidsign:

    ps- don't trust anyone who eats a lot of those damn Subway sandwiches either. You know...The Jarrettians.
    Alright
    Tap the lightpole and we'll be jammin all night
    And ain't nobody callin' the cops
    'Cause everybody's here freakin', if they're older they're doin the rock
    And every block from all around
    Comes runnin' to the park when they hear the sound
    And soon the word's spreadin' through our part of town
    "Yo, 40 Park y'all, Jam-On's gettin down"
    Yeah...

    Jam-On Productions:Website Forum

  14. #14
    Senior Member frEk's Avatar
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    [b]finally coz you have really done your homework and came up with some real facts, you did however get some of them mixed up

    1. yes the wisdom teeth bit is true, but vegan nutritionalists have concluded that it just takes longer for vegan infant's teeth to grow because there is actually a 13% increase in tooth density among vegans in order to adapt to diets with a high concentration of roughage

    2. again for the soy based ice cream, the cause for this has been, until quite recently, unkown. but it has now been discovered that the brain freeze comes directly from the fact that ingested soy below 32 degrees actually forges new nueral pathways in the brain.

    3. and as for the farts, a new technology has recently been introduced and the marketing for a new device is now in the preliminary stages. an implant has been proposed to collect the gasous waste excreted from individual vegans and convert the gas into a multifaceted energy source, primarily for the use of powering ones car. it has even been speculated that up to 300 horse power can be achieved if the right mix of legumes is ingested. unfortunately the instalation of such a device will require invasive surgery, but early experiment subjects have found no discomfort once the device has been implanted, and approximately 25% of the subjects have even reported the device to be a source of pleasure.

    4. the rainforest has only been affected by vegan diets selectively, we are very careful to only remove diseased trees to grow our soy.

    5. and yes the mad cow was started by us, and new biological attacks are coming if you do not immediately cease to consume animals, this is your final warning

    6. and the 47 is only true, because the rest of the vegan population hasn't died yet, so the statistic cannot be verified. there is even a stronghold of asian vegan monks that have survived in isolation for the past 275 years.

    7. and hitler was not in fact vegan, it has been substantiated that he did, at times, consume various shell fish after the new nueral pathways i spoke of were introduced to his brain, causing massive brain failure and megalomania directly stemming from his consumption of shell fish. as for john wilkes booth, he was making a statement in the name of veganism by killing a known and avid consumer of meat.

    8 & 9. the premature ejaculations and frigity of men and women respectively is an instinct introduced by the nueral pathways forged by veganism, these instincts are designed to slow the growth of our race and dampen human overpopulation.

    10. and the orbit of the planet would in fact be affected by a world wide switch to vegansim, but unfinished calculations of the german mathematician, leibnez, has recently been completed and the conclusion is that the earth would actually shift farther away from the sun just enough to end global warming once and for all.

    and i would be careful about shunning vegans, we are in fact your enemy so it would be wise to keep us close, this was dave thomas's grave mistake........he pissed off the animal liberation federation (ALF), and a similiar fate is in store for each and every consumer of meat if they are not careful.............

  15. #15
    king of useless info syxxpm's Avatar
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    l o fucking l -frek-syxxpm :rofl:
    the vibe says syxx so let it be syxx......

  16. #16
    Administrator eternals layre's Avatar
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    SHow me a vegan that can kick my @$$
    America needs a Tennessee Volunteer

  17. #17
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    do you really believe that you wouldn't be as strong without consuming flesh?
    psha, I'm one of the toughest people I know.
    peace and love to you,
    Elizabeth

  18. #18
    Senior Member frEk's Avatar
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    [b]respect the vegan mutha fucka, both the impersonator and the impersated are vegan.........and they can kick some shit.......you get a point if ya know em both

  19. #19
    Senior Member Etherspin's Avatar
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    yanno what.. I respect vegans even tho I am not one in any way shape or form..
    They have something they believe in, which requires a change of lifestyle, and they stick with it.. loadsa people in this world have beliefs that translate 2 big fat nothing in terms of actions..

  20. #20
    king of useless info syxxpm's Avatar
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    is that prince....the skinny muthafucka in the tight pants...
    (qoute from the prince song "bob george" from the black album @1988)

    or I hate to see an accordion go too waste.........any body get the original reference for that? -syxxpm hehehe
    the vibe says syxx so let it be syxx......

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