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Ay there! I'm Planet Sequel, the son and heir of everything and nothing inpartcular, and all that! :rofl: . I know you guys were no doubt expecting Stan to post something unorthodox on this page, but he's not well (as if), so I took the liberty to speak my mind. I couldn't go to the other guys and I need a place to vent.
I remember a couple of weeks back when my shorty dragged me to see one of those stupid-ass foreign flicks. Normally I would protest because, I'm, a man and I don't do that kind of shit, know what I'm sayin'. But then it hit me. It had been a while since I had some of that poo-tang. (don't even try to act like y'all don't know what I'm talking about) So bro' man's sympathy side kicked in and I thought "Yo, fuck it! Why not kick some slang out. What I got to lose? Bump that, what I got to gain? So I got cleaned up, slipped on some nice threads, busted out the Giorgio colonge and all that cool shit, and when to see the flick with my queen. Yeah, u heard me.
So any rate, I cooling in the theatre, got my arm around her while she all up in the picture. Y'know, laughing, crying getting all emotional and everything. Normally I would be doing what any other cat in my situation would do. Protest, fall asleep, blow my brains out with my finger, stick my finger in my mouth, hang my self with an imaginary rope, you know all that crap. Fellas, holla if you feel me! But instead, I'm just sitting there keeping my sanity the only way I know how; by dreaming of that nice sweet potato pie that I'm gonna get when all this is over. Finally the flick comes to an end, and we heading to egress. (See y'all didn't know that about me did y'all. That I was cultured and shit. Look out, now!) Like I was saying, we're heading out the door and before I can enjoy the smell of the night rain, she snatches the car keys out my hand and makes a fucking t.v. show out of me!"
"I try to show this piece of shit a good time, and he just sits on his ass like a bump on a log, Jesus!" The way she told me off, I thought I was on one of those reality based shows, playa. She called me every name from A to Z., Names that I could'nt even pronounce. And before I could get a word in edged wise, she cut me off like that song by Sparkle. "Wait a minute, let me finish!" And if that ain't a foot, broke off in yo ass, she went old school on me, and when your girl goes old school on you, you know you ass is fucked-up. While she going on and on, I couldn't do nothing but stand there like "how in the name of monkey piss did we get here?!"
"And you let me tell you another goddamn thing!" Don't you love it when they say shit like this. "I give you my heart, my soul. Now I can't give you punk ass nothing but advice. But don't worry, you're still young and you gonna find somebody like me one of these days."
Man, this shit went on for an hour. She even quoted Oran "Juice" Jones by saying shit like 'I was just a squirrel trying to get a nut, and without her I wasn't nothing but cornflake without the milk." I couldn't do nothing but shit on myself (not literally, figuratively)
Finally she finished her lecture and to show there were no hard feelings, she drove home while I rode shotgun feeling less of a man. Damn! :sad:
I sat on the couch all night comtemplating my manhood wondering wtf happened and shit. And then it hit me! It wasn't that I do things with my queen, is that I have to want to do things with my queen. So I took it in to heart and things are back to normal and I am the man again.
Well I took too much of your time, so I gots to bounce. My queen say she's serving some poo-tang pie for dinner. If my boo is reading this, I'm on my way, and to the rest of y'all, I leave you these words:
"You might think that life is a bitch, and no one can take it harder than you, but if you play your cards right, no one can take more than you either."
Take it light.
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:naughty: :sdldawn: :syxxpm: :offtheair:
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Stan...this is a true lesson that you have shared here. One that I'm afraid that many people will never learn. :wink: :rock: :rock: :rock:
